October 9, 2001

“Quite Frankly”

I am a huge fan of “The Godfather.”  I have seen the three movies many times.  So many times, in fact, that I have committed much of the dialog to memory.  Those of you that have also seen “The Godfather” will recall that in part 2, Michael Corleone had gravitated to Las Vegas.  In the several years since Don Vito’s demise, the young Godfather has consolidated his affairs and is now trying to wrangle a deal with Hyman Roth, the Miami based hood that has significant holdings in pre-Castro Cuba.

During the early stages of the story, an attempted assassination is made on Michael.  It was thought that the perpetrator was the obnoxious Frank Pantangele who had come to Vegas from New York to negotiate a settlement with the Don.  After the attempted “hit,” Michael began his epic journey to Miami, New York and Cuba.  It was during a meeting in Miami that he deduced that it was Roth who had masterminded the hit, but  The Don was OK with that because…it was strictly business.

Even though Roth and The Don were now in battle, Michael went forward with his plan.  First, he went to New York to deal with Pantangele.  Then he traveled to Havana to participate in the negotiations with Roth.  It should be noted that Roth’s henchmen included Johnny Oler, “the Sicilian Messenger Boy.”  After The Don finalized his deal with Roth, it was necessary for him to give Roth two million dollars to seal the deal.  The Don therefore instructed his brother, Fredo, to bring the two mil to Cuba.

When Freddy arrived in Havana, he inquired to The Don as to what they were going to do with the money.  Michael responded that he was cooking up a deal to move the family business.  Freddy was excited and said…”Havana…great…great place…Do I know anybody?”  Michael responded…”Oh…there’s Hyman Roth…Johnny Oler…you know them”  Freddy then responded,…”No…I don’t know anything about Hyman Roth and Johnny Oler”

Of course, we all know that Freddy knew Roth and Oler all too well.  It seems he had been in contact with the bastards before and had helped them with their attempted hit on The Don at his Lake Tahoe home.  Yes folks, Fredo, the weak and stupid one, was lying.

Lying even played a major factor in the story of our savior, The Lord, Jesus Christ.  You will recall that Christ gathered his faithful apostles for a “Last Supper.”  It was during dinner that Jesus passed out the cigars and began to evaluate how each of the Apostles had behaved during their time together.  When he got to Peter he thanked him for his kindness and support through the years.  Peter being a real go-getter maintained that he would stand behind Christ to the bitter end.  In turn, Jesus suggested that before the night was over, Peter would diss him not once but three times.

Peter scoffed at this malarkey.  However….when it was all said and done, Peter indeed uttered the now famous…”No…I don’t know anything about Jesus Christ.”

Lying, it seems, is as old as civilization itself.  Interestingly enough, lying has become an American tradition.  According to studies done by noted psychologists, the average American lies 20 times per day.  That’s about once per hour for most people.  I myself have been known to “spin a yarn” on occasion.  I especially like to lie about my weight.  It’s not uncommon for someone to comment that I look to have lost some weight.  I’ll counter with a “Yeah, I’m down to 250!”  That’s a lie.  I haven’t seen the left side of 255 since about 1995! 

I also like to lie to myself.  This usually happens after a couple of cold ones have gone down.  With the beer goggles firmly in place, a quick look in the mirror reveals a good-looking guy.  That’s a lie!

Politics can produce some top notch lying.  If the average American lies 20 times per day, the average politician probably lies 200 times per day.  You can always tell when a politician is lying.  In response to any question, he will precede his answer with the salvo “Quite Frankly” (QF). 

Individuals who frequently use the QF dodge include: Dick Cheney, Newt Gingrich, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Barr, Dick Armey, Tom DeLay, Orrin Hatch and Trent Lott.  Anytime one of those individuals utters a QF, you can assume they are lying.  Bank on it.  In addition, when politicians use a QF, they will invariably talk out of the side of their mouth.  That’s why I like watching Dick Cheney interviews.  He can talk from the side with the best of them.  However, for the penultimate side talker, I’d have to vote for Dick Morris.  Dick is not only a QFing side talker; he’s also a toe sucker.  What is up with that?

Quite Frankly when used correctly is considered a key mechanism of positive control.  Control language can fall into two categories. Optimistic, positive governing words that can be used to describe a political candidate’s vision for the future.  Contrasting words can be used by the candidate to defame and slander an opponent.  Examples of optimistic words include: change, moral, family, liberty, empower and principle.  Contrasting words include: crisis, sick, pathetic, looser, bizarre, corrupt, liberal, tax and spend.

This years general election has produced some interesting circumstances.  Rick Shenker baptized the race for County Executive in January with a “civility pledge.”  Ms. Lynch signed the pledge and the parties went on the stoop, looking for your vote.  Everything was hunky-dorry until September 13^th.  That’s when a news story surfaced that alleged that the Courthouse had a broken, metal detector.  It seems that Ms. Lynch had advised the security staff to continue to use it even though it was broken.  It was soon determined that this was not the case.  Ms. Lynch and her administration were vindicated.

Unfortunately Mr. Schenker’s campaign placed a vocal statement in the media expressing their belief that Ms. Lynch and/or her administration were “sick, pathetic, corrupt loosers that were compromising the security of the courthouse.”  This is the point were Mr. Schenker violated the “civility pledge.”  Therefore, I do not feel that Mr. Schenker can hide behind the pledge.  However, quite frankly, I think Mr. Schenker is getting a raw deal here.  Quite frankly, he is an honest, thoughtful family man who is morally principled.  His campaign of change is bound to empower Erie County’s voters with a sence of pride and commitment.  Quite frankly, I know Rick Schenker…he’s got it…yeah, baby…he’s got it.